I assume that there are one or more mods monitoring this post, but I wanted to ask about the appropriateness of the comments, which are starting to move from "We accept your situation here are some supportive and gentle suggestions" to "your relationship is unhealthy and you need to change it."
Is a comment like "My take on this is that your mom is, indeed, irrationally controlling and intrusive. You need some separation from her" crossing the line for VP? What about "You are an adult. You need to set some boundaries"?
These comments were exactly what I was thinking, but I wouldn't have written them down because it's not what the OP asked for and "shoulds" are generally discouraged in VP. What do you think?